1
00:00:06,965 --> 00:00:08,466
[David] You could learn how to do that.
2
00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:10,343
[David's voice playing in reverse]
3
00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:11,636
[rewinding]
4
00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:15,640
Shoving a butt plug-- butt plug
in the asshole-- asshole of your mind.
5
00:00:15,724 --> 00:00:16,599
[fast forwarding]
6
00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:18,393
-I'm enlightened now.
-[whirring]
7
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:19,686
[clicks]
8
00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:20,979
[whirring]
9
00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:22,939
[rhythmic music playing]
♪ Butt plug ♪
10
00:00:23,982 --> 00:00:24,899
♪ Butt plug ♪
11
00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:27,152
♪ Butt plug ♪
12
00:00:27,652 --> 00:00:30,572
-[Clancy's voice] I'm enlightened now.
-[David] In the asshole of your mind.
13
00:00:30,655 --> 00:00:32,532
-♪ Butt, butt plug ♪
-[vacuum suctioning]
14
00:00:33,575 --> 00:00:34,534
♪ Butt plug... ♪
15
00:00:34,617 --> 00:00:35,618
I need light.
16
00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:38,121
-Or plants.
-[Clancy's voice] I'm enlightened now.
17
00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:40,331
-What, my chonchichi?
-[barks]
18
00:00:40,415 --> 00:00:41,583
Bed? No.
19
00:00:41,666 --> 00:00:43,918
[computer]
Clancy, I found a planet that you'll like.
20
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:45,670
-[Clancy] We'll see about that.
-[whirring]
21
00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:47,255
[computer] Norval 8.
22
00:00:47,338 --> 00:00:49,716
This planet has rivers of wine
and mescaline fruit.
23
00:00:49,799 --> 00:00:51,384
That parrot would make a great interview.
24
00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:53,636
Oh, I'm sorry.
Maybe you didn't hear the song, but...
25
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,264
-[David] ♪ Butt plug ♪
-[Clancy's voice] I'm enlightened now.
26
00:00:56,347 --> 00:00:58,933
I'm enlightened now! Ah!
I got enlightened! Uh!
27
00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:00,602
What about Lensor-Didor?
28
00:01:00,685 --> 00:01:03,354
The planet of waterslide parks
and trampolines--
29
00:01:03,438 --> 00:01:04,939
-I'm enlightened now!
-[pops]
30
00:01:05,023 --> 00:01:07,776
-Okay, what about Planet Blank Ball?
-Perfect.
31
00:01:07,859 --> 00:01:10,236
I made you some boring avatars,
Enlightened One.
32
00:01:10,695 --> 00:01:11,529
Thank you.
33
00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:14,074
-[whirring]
-Do you like them?
34
00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:17,285
[hesitantly] Yeah...
35
00:01:17,994 --> 00:01:21,331
I made one that looks just like you,
except it's made out of cream.
36
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:22,874
-Is that cool?
-Mmm.
37
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:24,834
-Yeah.
-[whirring]
38
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:27,754
Send me down to Planet Blank Ball, boy!
39
00:01:27,837 --> 00:01:28,838
[computer] As you wish.
40
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:31,716
Merging with simulator in...
Are you chewing gum?
41
00:01:33,384 --> 00:01:34,928
-[Clancy spits]
-Thank you, Master.
42
00:01:35,011 --> 00:01:36,596
-Love you, bud.
-Two...
43
00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:38,223
one...
44
00:01:42,811 --> 00:01:43,812
[grunts]
45
00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:46,314
[groans]
46
00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:49,442
It really is just a big, blank ball.
47
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:56,366
[inhales, exhales]
48
00:01:57,242 --> 00:02:00,829
Oh, God, fuck this.
Let's spice this ball up!
49
00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:07,961
Hey, man.
50
00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:11,131
-[groaning]
-[slide screeching]
51
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:13,883
-[thudding]
-Oh!
52
00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:16,344
[grunting]
53
00:02:17,345 --> 00:02:18,930
[groaning]
54
00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:22,851
Hey, man, you got a hose for this thing?
55
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:23,768
I'm all chafed.
56
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:25,061
[clears throat]
57
00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:26,896
You don't talk?
58
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:29,357
Okay, that's cool.
59
00:02:29,858 --> 00:02:31,025
There's got to be one in here.
60
00:02:32,068 --> 00:02:33,987
I've just got to remember where I put it.
61
00:02:34,070 --> 00:02:35,947
[screams] Yeah!
62
00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:43,705
Whoa!
63
00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:44,622
[thuds]
64
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:49,252
[creature squawking]
65
00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:50,837
[Clancy] Wow.
66
00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:53,840
Damn.
67
00:02:54,340 --> 00:02:55,592
That's a lot of stuff.
68
00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:57,594
-[elephant trumpeting]
-[Clancy whistles]
69
00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,096
What's up, baby?
70
00:03:01,222 --> 00:03:02,056
[groaning]
71
00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:02,974
Who's there?
72
00:03:03,057 --> 00:03:04,767
[groaning continues]
73
00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:05,852
[sniffs]
74
00:03:05,935 --> 00:03:06,853
[groaning]
75
00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:09,105
[whispering] Must ask questions.
76
00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:12,108
-So much mystery.
-[buzzing]
77
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,445
Perfect for spacecast.
78
00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:18,823
[deep voice] I am Death.
79
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:22,035
-It's nice to meet you. My name's Clancy.
-[Death wheezing, coughing]
80
00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:24,078
[female voice]
Sorry, I had something in my throat.
81
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:28,166
[low voice droning]
82
00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:31,169
Hey, would you like to be interviewed
for my spacecast? It's a space blast.
83
00:03:31,252 --> 00:03:32,295
It goes into space.
84
00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:33,671
I... guess.
85
00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:36,591
But before we start,
you need to describe my form
86
00:03:36,674 --> 00:03:38,968
so I can manifest.
87
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,261
-Huh?
-[Death] Describe me.
88
00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:42,388
What does Death look like to you?
89
00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:45,099
Uh, all right, 14 feet tall
with nice hair,
90
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:48,269
one fun eyeball, a crab claw
with a fancy jeweled glove, a bat wing,
91
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:51,522
one clown leg
and all that in a child's red wagon.
92
00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,817
-Is the wagon a part of me?
-[Clancy] Yeah.
93
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:57,654
And your butt is a rhino back half
with a food force field,
94
00:03:57,737 --> 00:04:00,448
and the rhino's legs
are always standing in poop.
95
00:04:04,369 --> 00:04:06,788
[Death] I think we need to simplify this.
96
00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:07,914
Oh, okay.
97
00:04:07,997 --> 00:04:11,251
Lose the middle and that gross boy
with the handles for hands.
98
00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:12,502
I didn't ask for that.
99
00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:16,130
[squeaks]
100
00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:19,050
[Clancy] Try putting that crab claw back,
but smaller.
101
00:04:19,133 --> 00:04:21,261
Now you can push along on the ground.
102
00:04:21,344 --> 00:04:22,762
This isn't very practical.
103
00:04:22,845 --> 00:04:24,889
[Clancy]
Okay. Well, how about you add a jet pack?
104
00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:28,685
I'm not like "creepy Death" anymore.
I'm just like--
105
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:31,646
All right, how do you feel
about just being a normal Grim Reaper,
106
00:04:31,729 --> 00:04:33,564
but keep that fun-looking eyeball?
107
00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:34,649
[Death sighs]
108
00:04:34,732 --> 00:04:35,733
You look cool.
109
00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:37,694
Mind if we can start the interview?
110
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:38,611
Oh, yeah.
111
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,613
-I'm gonna start recording.
-[creature chattering]
112
00:04:40,697 --> 00:04:42,365
-[Clancy] Hey, that's my hose!
-[Death] Huh.
113
00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:43,950
[chattering] Ha ha!
114
00:04:46,744 --> 00:04:47,662
[screams, squeaks]
115
00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:50,331
Fuck! That little tart baker took my hose.
116
00:04:50,415 --> 00:04:53,293
You mind if we walk and talk
so I can get the hose back
117
00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:55,044
-for my waterslide?
-Sure.
118
00:04:55,545 --> 00:04:57,171
-[Clancy] So you're Death.
-[Death] Mm-hmm.
119
00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:59,132
[Clancy]
Losing people to you is so painful.
120
00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:00,049
[Death] It is.
121
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,009
Do you have any advice
122
00:05:01,092 --> 00:05:03,845
for people who are dealing with death
in their own lives?
123
00:05:03,928 --> 00:05:10,143
Yeah. So the best thing you could possibly
do for yourself in your entire life,
124
00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:13,855
I think, is be super present
for those moments.
125
00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:15,189
-Yes!
-Like, 100% in,
126
00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:16,816
like, sitting with the dead body
127
00:05:16,899 --> 00:05:19,235
or 100%, like, sitting with the placenta
128
00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,488
and the newborn, mewling,
covered-in-mucus baby.
129
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:23,740
Yes.
130
00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:26,576
[Death]
These are the moments of primal reality
131
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:30,330
-that we don't get in our daily lives.
-Yeah. Mm-hmm.
132
00:05:30,580 --> 00:05:35,543
-And they're actively kept from us.
-[sinister laughter]
133
00:05:35,626 --> 00:05:36,669
By an elaborate system.
134
00:05:36,753 --> 00:05:38,755
What is that system?
135
00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:42,508
This seems truly like the conspiracy
nobody talks about.
136
00:05:42,925 --> 00:05:45,219
Yeah,
it's one of my favorite conspiracies,
137
00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:47,180
is, like, the death industrial complex.
138
00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:49,682
[Clancy] What is this?
Can we talk about this?
139
00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:53,644
Well, I can tell you for death
and I can tell you my theories.
140
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:56,356
Which, I don't even know if they're
theories. I think they're facts.
141
00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:58,066
-I'll put them out there as facts.
-Cool.
142
00:05:58,149 --> 00:06:02,945
So, what happened, it really happened
around the turn of the 20th century.
143
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:03,863
So you had--
144
00:06:03,946 --> 00:06:05,865
-And keep in mind...
-[snarling]
145
00:06:05,948 --> 00:06:07,116
...this is primar--
146
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:10,453
The extent to which it happens
is an American convention.
147
00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:11,371
[Clancy] Oh.
148
00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:13,664
-It's a United States convention.
-[Clancy] Yeah.
149
00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:16,876
It happens to some degree
in many other places in the world,
150
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:19,754
but the US is really the king.
151
00:06:19,837 --> 00:06:23,132
It's the mafia don
of this kind of cover-up of death.
152
00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:25,051
Sorry. I'm sorry.
I don't mean to interrupt you.
153
00:06:25,134 --> 00:06:27,470
Can you tell me
what these tart-baking mirrors are?
154
00:06:27,553 --> 00:06:28,471
Sure.
155
00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,473
This is a trial of judgment.
156
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:33,893
All these mirrors reflect
parts of yourself that you're ashamed of,
157
00:06:33,976 --> 00:06:38,106
stuff you try to hide from yourself.
You have to forgive them.
158
00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:40,817
-Forgive them?
-Sure. This is a good icebreaker.
159
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:43,194
-[Clancy] Hmm.
-[snarling]
160
00:06:43,611 --> 00:06:44,445
Huh?
161
00:06:44,529 --> 00:06:48,032
[Death] So during the American Civil War,
you see the rise of embalming,
162
00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:50,368
which is chemically treating a dead body,
163
00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:54,747
which keeps it fresh a little longer,
staves off decomposition a little longer.
164
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:58,501
Was this-- Was this because people
were dying far away from home
165
00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,002
-and they wanted--
-Exactly. Exactly.
166
00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:04,257
So the history is that you had all these
Northern soldiers going down to the South,
167
00:07:04,340 --> 00:07:05,758
dying on the battlefield.
168
00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:09,262
It was really important
in the Protestant ethos of the time
169
00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:11,013
-that you see the dead body.
-[Clancy] Hmm.
170
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:15,309
[Death] So the train conductors
were getting all these decomposing corpses
171
00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:16,811
on their train and they would go,
172
00:07:16,894 --> 00:07:19,188
"Nope, kick 'em out.
We're not doing this anymore.
173
00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:22,442
You can't pile up
your decomposing corpses in my train."
174
00:07:22,525 --> 00:07:24,026
[playing jazz]
175
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:26,028
[Clancy] Holy shit, a sax man.
176
00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:27,280
[Death] That's Judgment.
177
00:07:27,363 --> 00:07:29,907
Wow, I was just thinking,
"I wish there was a sax man around."
178
00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:34,579
So you had these enterprising young men,
who were embalmers,
179
00:07:34,662 --> 00:07:38,541
who would follow the battles,
battlefield to battlefield,
180
00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:39,959
like ambulance chasers.
181
00:07:40,042 --> 00:07:41,335
-Whoa.
-Going to the battles
182
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:42,628
and setting up their tents.
183
00:07:42,712 --> 00:07:45,631
They would prop up abandoned bodies
184
00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:48,176
that they had embalmed
from the battlefield
185
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:50,761
to show their work,
as little advertisements,
186
00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:53,306
like window advertisements
for their skills.
187
00:07:53,389 --> 00:07:55,433
-[Clancy] Wow.
-[Death] And you would pay them
188
00:07:55,516 --> 00:07:58,102
to basically, at that time,
disembowel the body,
189
00:07:58,186 --> 00:08:02,523
put some arsenic in the body
to preserve the body.
190
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:03,608
Arsenic's a preservative?
191
00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:05,026
-Yeah, it's a preservative.
-Huh.
192
00:08:05,109 --> 00:08:07,236
They don't use it anymore,
'cause it's terrible, but...
193
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:10,031
Now they use formaldehyde.
But at the time, they used arsenic.
194
00:08:10,114 --> 00:08:12,200
-Huh.
-[continues playing jazz]
195
00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:14,785
[scat singing]
196
00:08:15,786 --> 00:08:17,288
-[creature squeaks]
-[Judgment screams]
197
00:08:17,371 --> 00:08:19,457
-[Clancy] Hey, that's my hose. I need it.
-Ha ha!
198
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:20,374
Grow up.
199
00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,251
So what I was saying,
it was a dangerous job
200
00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:24,587
and they would send the body back up north
201
00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:27,715
and it would preserve it
for that period of travel,
202
00:08:27,798 --> 00:08:30,301
which was an interesting innovation.
203
00:08:30,384 --> 00:08:31,928
So, wait, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
204
00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:33,930
-This is a lot of information...
-[Death chuckles]
205
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:34,931
...and it's really--
206
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:38,226
[Death] That's the bit-- that's the intro.
We haven't even got to the explanation.
207
00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:39,936
-[Clancy] Give me that!
-[creature squeaks]
208
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:42,438
[whispers] You're gonna die
after stepping on a ping-pong ball.
209
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:45,066
[squeaks, buzzes]
210
00:08:45,149 --> 00:08:46,067
[distant crash]
211
00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:46,984
[laughter echoing]
212
00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:49,070
Okay, okay, so, you would get your...
213
00:08:49,153 --> 00:08:52,114
-Your uncle would come in a train...
-Yes.
214
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,491
...stuffed with arsenic?
215
00:08:53,574 --> 00:08:57,745
Not-- Stuffed with sawdust, actually.
At the time, the embalming was...
216
00:08:57,828 --> 00:08:58,829
They would disembowel you,
217
00:08:58,913 --> 00:09:00,540
meaning they removed your internal organs,
218
00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:03,167
'cause that's really
where decomposition happens
219
00:09:03,251 --> 00:09:05,753
is in the gooey
middle part of your body.
220
00:09:05,836 --> 00:09:07,588
So they would disembowel all your organs,
221
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,007
they would stuff you with sawdust
or something to keep you...
222
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:13,386
-[distant voice chattering]
-...you know, your stomach extended,
223
00:09:13,469 --> 00:09:17,765
and then they would fill your body,
your circulatory system,
224
00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:19,642
with some kind of preservative.
225
00:09:22,478 --> 00:09:24,063
[creature] Whoa!
226
00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:32,113
[Death sighs]
227
00:09:32,196 --> 00:09:35,533
They're doing this and it's actually sort
of a sensible innovation for the time.
228
00:09:35,616 --> 00:09:37,702
People want their dead sons back
229
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:40,705
and they get their dead sons back
because of this process.
230
00:09:40,788 --> 00:09:42,039
-[Clancy] Yes.
-But what happens
231
00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:45,751
is that these same men are going,
"Wait a second. The war's over now,
232
00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,087
but this is my business.
This is what I do now.
233
00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:51,799
So we have to convince the rest of the
country that embalming is the way to go."
234
00:09:51,882 --> 00:09:53,259
[Clancy] Whoa.
235
00:09:53,342 --> 00:09:56,512
[Death] And so these men set out,
they go across the country,
236
00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:57,805
they're selling their wares.
237
00:09:57,888 --> 00:09:59,849
They're kind of like Amway salesmen
at first.
238
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:03,477
They're going town to town,
holding three-day embalming courses,
239
00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:06,731
saying, "Come on down,
learn how to embalm."
240
00:10:09,650 --> 00:10:11,819
-That makes sense, yeah?
-[Clancy] I like this guy.
241
00:10:11,902 --> 00:10:12,737
[Death chuckles]
242
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:15,990
The real trick of it,
the real thing that really worked,
243
00:10:16,073 --> 00:10:17,575
is at the turn of the 20th century,
244
00:10:17,658 --> 00:10:22,747
they really started to push the idea,
based on, now, very bad science...
245
00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:25,541
And, honestly,
it was already bad science at the time.
246
00:10:25,958 --> 00:10:28,294
It's that the dead body is dangerous...
247
00:10:28,377 --> 00:10:30,129
-Yes. That's what I thought.
-...in some way.
248
00:10:30,212 --> 00:10:36,135
Unless the person who died
had Ebola or avian bird flu
249
00:10:36,218 --> 00:10:40,723
or some-- one of these incredibly rare,
wildly infectious diseases...
250
00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:42,183
-Plague.
-...in which case,
251
00:10:42,266 --> 00:10:45,770
the CDC would come collect them
immediately and take them for cremation.
252
00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:47,772
They wouldn't be going
to a normal funeral home--
253
00:10:47,855 --> 00:10:50,983
-Save some money that way.
-Yeah, you know, "Did your dad have Ebola?
254
00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:54,403
That sucks, but, good news,
the government's gonna take care of it."
255
00:10:55,071 --> 00:10:56,656
So unless that's the case,
256
00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,241
your body almost instantly
becomes far more safe...
257
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:00,201
Ow, ow, ow!
258
00:11:00,284 --> 00:11:01,452
-There you go.
-[sighs]
259
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,162
...the second that it dies,
260
00:11:03,245 --> 00:11:07,500
because not only are the viruses and
the bacteria dying off pretty quickly...
261
00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:09,669
-Those don't live in your body that long.
-Huh.
262
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:14,840
Also, the things that are infectious about
a sick person or a dying person are what?
263
00:11:14,924 --> 00:11:17,468
-Coughing, sneezing, pooping, bleeding.
-[Clancy] Whoa.
264
00:11:17,551 --> 00:11:20,221
-All these things that get you...
-Right!
265
00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:22,848
...they'd stop doing that
when they were dead.
266
00:11:23,265 --> 00:11:24,892
[Death] So that's a positive.
267
00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:27,520
You know,
as far as keeping your safety intact.
268
00:11:27,603 --> 00:11:30,606
-[Clancy] Mmm. Wow.
-But if you're able to, say...
269
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:34,151
keep your dad under hospice
and wash him and dress him
270
00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:35,611
and do all these things...
271
00:11:36,028 --> 00:11:38,614
he's... You know
that he's completely safe.
272
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:41,951
-Right.
-And nothing changes when he dies.
273
00:11:42,034 --> 00:11:45,955
-It's the same thing.
-It's the same thing, if not safer.
274
00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:49,458
So it's like... Oh, my God.
That is so creepy.
275
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,252
And keep in mind,
humans were doing this,
276
00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:53,671
taking care of their own dead in this way,
277
00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:56,382
for tens of thousands of years
of human history.
278
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:57,633
This is just the norm.
279
00:11:57,717 --> 00:12:01,345
It's only been in the last, honestly,
100, 120 years
280
00:12:01,429 --> 00:12:04,640
-that what happened is, these embalmers...
-[snarling]
281
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:06,267
...these same men we were talking about,
282
00:12:06,350 --> 00:12:08,686
-were really able to push the idea...
-[grunts]
283
00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:11,564
...that what they were doing
by embalming the body
284
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:14,066
-is making it safe for the family.
-Holy shit.
285
00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:19,447
Disinfecting it. Making it acceptable
and safe for the family to see.
286
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:21,282
-[Clancy] Right.
-[Death] So whereas before,
287
00:12:21,365 --> 00:12:23,159
it was mostly women...
288
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,911
who were in the home,
just washing the body
289
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:28,038
and waking the body and laying it out,
290
00:12:28,122 --> 00:12:32,126
now, all of a sudden, you have men
coming in who aren't part of the family,
291
00:12:32,209 --> 00:12:36,589
who are different professionals,
saying, "It's not safe for you to do it.
292
00:12:36,672 --> 00:12:38,674
We're gonna need to come get the body,
293
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,885
prepare it
through this process of embalming
294
00:12:40,968 --> 00:12:41,886
and charge you for it."
295
00:12:41,969 --> 00:12:44,722
Holy shit. Did you say "waking the body"?
296
00:12:44,805 --> 00:12:46,557
"Waking" meaning, like, viewing the body,
297
00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:47,683
-laying it out...
-Oh, okay.
298
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:51,103
...for the family to come around
and hang out with it, basically.
299
00:12:51,187 --> 00:12:55,232
So, all of a sudden, it now starts to,
in the early 20th century,
300
00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:57,276
move towards this...
301
00:12:57,818 --> 00:12:59,487
this financial model.
302
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:00,571
[growls]
303
00:13:01,071 --> 00:13:02,656
[Death] Oh, nuts.
304
00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:03,699
[growls]
305
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:06,410
[continues playing jazz]
306
00:13:06,494 --> 00:13:08,078
-[Death] Where was I?
-[Clancy screams]
307
00:13:08,162 --> 00:13:08,996
[Death] Oh, right.
308
00:13:09,079 --> 00:13:12,166
-This capitalist model of death...
-[Clancy screaming]
309
00:13:12,249 --> 00:13:17,379
...where you have to turn your body
over to a funeral home to take it...
310
00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:19,965
drain the blood, put in the chemicals...
311
00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:21,258
Wow.
312
00:13:21,342 --> 00:13:25,554
...put on the makeup, put him in a suit
and essentially sell your dad back to you.
313
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,181
Wow.
314
00:13:27,264 --> 00:13:28,390
[distant laughter]
315
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:32,478
They can't necessarily let people know...
316
00:13:32,561 --> 00:13:37,274
And what I do primarily is I advocate
for something called home funerals...
317
00:13:37,358 --> 00:13:39,276
-[snarling]
-...which is not that complicated.
318
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:43,781
It's just you taking more initiative
with the death.
319
00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:47,117
Hey, you going somewhere?
Can I come along with you?
320
00:13:47,201 --> 00:13:48,285
-Hell, yeah.
-[laughing]
321
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:49,203
[Death] Yeah, sure.
322
00:13:50,204 --> 00:13:51,580
I love this type of shit.
323
00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:55,042
Yeah. So say your dad
dies at home on hospice.
324
00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:57,837
You don't have to call anyone right now.
It's not an emergency.
325
00:13:57,920 --> 00:14:00,339
He's not decomposing immediately.
326
00:14:00,422 --> 00:14:01,465
He's not getting dangerous.
327
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,133
-Wait a sec.
-[Clancy] I need the hose.
328
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:05,469
He's dead now.
He's gonna be dead two hours from now.
329
00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:08,138
-[Clancy] For my slide.
-Everything's okay. It's not an emergency.
330
00:14:08,222 --> 00:14:11,225
And just, to the degree
that you feel comfortable,
331
00:14:11,308 --> 00:14:13,769
sitting with that primal reality,
as we said,
332
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,020
sitting in that moment.
333
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:17,481
-Wow.
-Feeling the feelings that come out
334
00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:21,318
and only calling the funeral home
when you feel ready.
335
00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:23,112
Well, it's kinda too late for me.
336
00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:25,906
Both my parents are friends of yours,
I guess you could say.
337
00:14:26,407 --> 00:14:28,242
[playing ragtime]
338
00:14:28,325 --> 00:14:29,994
[chattering indistinctly]
339
00:14:30,077 --> 00:14:30,911
[gasps]
340
00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:32,663
-[elevator dings]
-Come on! [grunts]
341
00:14:32,746 --> 00:14:34,623
Get back here, you little hose thief!
342
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,251
You know both time... Both parents... Wow.
343
00:14:37,835 --> 00:14:40,212
Both parents passing, it was just...
344
00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:42,172
very...
345
00:14:42,256 --> 00:14:43,465
It was not like this.
346
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:44,550
[Death] Mm-hmm.
347
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:45,759
That no one sat...
348
00:14:45,843 --> 00:14:48,262
Interestingly, no one sat with us
and was like, "Listen..."
349
00:14:48,345 --> 00:14:49,722
Enter! [snoring]
350
00:14:49,805 --> 00:14:51,515
"...the body's not diseased."
351
00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:55,060
No. No one would sit with...
No one would tell you this. No one.
352
00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:56,729
[snoring]
353
00:14:59,189 --> 00:15:00,274
[grunting]
354
00:15:00,357 --> 00:15:01,942
"The body,
you could just hang out with...
355
00:15:02,026 --> 00:15:04,778
You probably should hang out
with her or him for a while.
356
00:15:04,862 --> 00:15:06,947
-Just sit with him. It's okay."
-[grunts]
357
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:07,907
No one said that.
358
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:14,121
And, also, it's not like
there is some great desire in people
359
00:15:14,204 --> 00:15:15,748
to hang out with a dead body.
360
00:15:15,831 --> 00:15:18,334
Well, you know, that's complicated.
361
00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:22,296
And that's something that I'm always
thinking about and negotiating.
362
00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:24,214
Because the people who do it,
363
00:15:24,298 --> 00:15:28,469
the people who have some inkling that
they might want to do it but aren't sure
364
00:15:28,552 --> 00:15:30,512
and then they're given the permission,
365
00:15:30,596 --> 00:15:34,892
they end up having
this magical, transformative experience.
366
00:15:34,975 --> 00:15:36,644
I say it's like chocolate and puppies.
367
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:39,229
Like, that's the kind of feedback
that you get.
368
00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:40,606
-Right.
-People love it.
369
00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:41,941
[high-pitched feedback ringing]
370
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:43,317
[snoring]
371
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,570
And here's what happens...
372
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:48,739
to so many people.
373
00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:50,449
[continues playing jazz]
374
00:15:50,532 --> 00:15:51,533
[Clancy] By the time...
375
00:15:52,451 --> 00:15:55,329
the dying person
is ready to start talking about it...
376
00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:57,665
-[high-pitched chatter]
-...their mind is disintegrating.
377
00:15:57,748 --> 00:16:00,167
-[Death] Yes.
-[Clancy] So they can't talk about it.
378
00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:04,129
They're not able to articulate
exactly what it is they want.
379
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:05,172
[Death] Mm-hmm.
380
00:16:05,255 --> 00:16:06,757
[Clancy] Right away, your mind goes.
381
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,759
-Your mind is out of here, man.
-[plays woodwind]
382
00:16:08,842 --> 00:16:11,220
You're, like, fluctuating
through the past, present.
383
00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:12,680
You're just going into the past--
384
00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:16,308
You're talking to your husband
who died 20 years ago.
385
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,561
That's right. You know,
it's totally different from a movie.
386
00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:23,524
In the movies, a guy's laying there, then,
all of a sudden, he's like, "I'm dying!"
387
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,985
-[Death laughing]
-Then he just dies. He looks great.
388
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:28,821
-Like he just got a facial.
-[Death laughs]
389
00:16:28,904 --> 00:16:31,115
And then it's like,
"All right, see you later."
390
00:16:31,198 --> 00:16:32,241
He kind of looks over--
391
00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:34,618
"I'm sorry I won't be able to make it
to the ball."
392
00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:35,536
[both laughing]
393
00:16:35,619 --> 00:16:37,830
[Clancy]
"I'm out of the universe." Not even a...
394
00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:39,164
-[Clancy grunts]
-[Death] Mm-hmm.
395
00:16:39,248 --> 00:16:40,791
[Clancy] Just literally like...
396
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,167
Gone.
397
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:43,752
-Like, insane.
-[squeaks]
398
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:46,505
-[creature grunting]
-[Death] Yeah.
399
00:16:46,588 --> 00:16:49,591
[Clancy] So people see that shit
and they just assume,
400
00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:52,177
"Oh, I'll start planning for this thing...
401
00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:54,763
When I start getting sick
is when I'll start planning.
402
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,349
Based on the statistical probability
of my death,
403
00:16:57,433 --> 00:17:00,269
I've got some amount of time left
to plan for the thing."
404
00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:01,437
This is absurdity.
405
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:03,355
-You might have some moments...
-[Clancy groans]
406
00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:05,733
...of clarity, but when you
have moments of clarity,
407
00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:09,028
your family wants to talk to you
about how you are and the past.
408
00:17:09,111 --> 00:17:11,572
They don't want to talk to you
about what your death plan is
409
00:17:11,655 --> 00:17:13,741
-and if you want to be cremated.
-[creature roaring]
410
00:17:13,824 --> 00:17:17,453
This was the cool thing about my dad,
because when he was dying, he...
411
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:19,747
Man, it was wild. Sometimes he would...
412
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:21,540
Sorry, remind me.
What did your dad die of?
413
00:17:21,623 --> 00:17:23,709
I kill trillions of beings per second.
414
00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:24,793
The slow fades.
415
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:28,338
He stood under a horde shadow
during the Sector Wars.
416
00:17:28,422 --> 00:17:32,342
A tiny bit of the shadow just seeped in.
He struggled with it his entire life.
417
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:35,596
Eventually it got into his lungs.
He was a hero.
418
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:38,140
Found out about all his medals
after he died.
419
00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,391
Oh, right, right, right.
420
00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:40,893
[Clancy] So when he was dying, he...
421
00:17:40,976 --> 00:17:42,311
Sometimes, he would recognize me.
422
00:17:42,394 --> 00:17:46,106
Sometimes, he thought that I was someone
who was a soldier from the Sector Wars.
423
00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:48,150
-[Death] Probably the bald head.
-[Clancy laughing]
424
00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:50,819
[Death] That's a common thing
for people at the end of life.
425
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:53,363
[Clancy] He would be like,
"Who is your commanding officer?"
426
00:17:53,447 --> 00:17:56,450
He would say things like that.
It was really interesting, but...
427
00:17:56,533 --> 00:17:59,661
And so, you know, I was thinking,
"Well, I probably won't see him again."
428
00:17:59,745 --> 00:18:03,332
Like, "Right now what I'm seeing
is this sort of, like, sleepwalker.
429
00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:05,542
I don't know that I'll see my dad again."
430
00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:06,460
[snoring]
431
00:18:06,543 --> 00:18:09,880
[Clancy] And then, he'd pop back up.
He popped right out of it.
432
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:11,298
There he was.
433
00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:13,717
And he... And he was...
434
00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:18,430
Because I have been taught
to be honest with dying people...
435
00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:20,307
Thank God.
436
00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:23,185
When he would...
He said, "What's happening?"
437
00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:24,853
And I'm like, "Oh, you're dying."
438
00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:27,981
And then he's like, "Oh, okay.
439
00:18:28,065 --> 00:18:30,359
You'd better go get a pen
and a piece of paper."
440
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:33,320
And then he starts telling me, you know,
what to...
441
00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:35,572
You know, what to say to people.
442
00:18:35,656 --> 00:18:37,825
It was beautiful. It was wonderful.
443
00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:41,161
You know, including things which
I still haven't done. I've got to do this.
444
00:18:41,245 --> 00:18:43,288
-[Death laughs]
-You know, like, send a lunch platter
445
00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:44,206
to the hospice.
446
00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:47,960
All these beautiful instructions.
It was... I got lucky that he did this.
447
00:18:48,043 --> 00:18:50,045
Yeah. You should send a lunch platter
to the hospice.
448
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,005
-I'm going to.
-They'd love that.
449
00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:53,382
I'm going to do it.
450
00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:56,552
Dad, wherever you may be
in the past, present or future,
451
00:18:56,635 --> 00:18:58,262
it's happening, I'm sorry.
452
00:18:58,345 --> 00:19:00,430
I'm a little distracted.
That's not a good excuse.
453
00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:01,974
Easy to send a lunch platter.
454
00:19:02,182 --> 00:19:03,725
-[thuds]
-[high-pitched feedback ringing]
455
00:19:04,226 --> 00:19:07,312
Well, Death, it has been really great
getting to know you.
456
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:10,274
Likewise. Thank you
for letting me gab about my work.
457
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:11,817
[indistinct chatter]
458
00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:16,155
[snarling]
459
00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:19,032
[laughing]
460
00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:21,285
[Clancy] Hey, um, I need the hose.
461
00:19:21,368 --> 00:19:24,163
Excuse me. Pardon me.
Can you get... That's my hose.
462
00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:25,080
I need it.
463
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,832
-[mutters]
-[Clancy grunting] Hey, I need...
464
00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:28,584
Hey! Hey, man!
465
00:19:28,667 --> 00:19:30,836
Hey, man! Hey, man!
466
00:19:31,545 --> 00:19:34,131
-[grunting]
-[singing gibberish]
467
00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:37,718
Who dares to waken old Elevator Emperor?
468
00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:39,011
[grunts]
469
00:19:39,094 --> 00:19:40,012
[howls]
470
00:19:42,598 --> 00:19:44,892
-[screaming]
-[grunting]
471
00:19:44,975 --> 00:19:48,437
Anyone up for a game of basketball? No.
472
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,230
Baseball? No.
473
00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:52,941
-Ping-pong?
-No!
474
00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:54,484
[Death giggling]
475
00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:55,861
[screaming]
476
00:19:56,361 --> 00:19:58,572
-[Death laughing]
-[creatures screaming]
477
00:20:05,162 --> 00:20:07,164
[screaming]
478
00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:10,167
[all screaming]
479
00:20:12,252 --> 00:20:15,339
[Clancy panting, gasping]
480
00:20:16,798 --> 00:20:20,052
[screaming]
481
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:26,308
[screaming]
482
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:27,309
Stop fighting it.
483
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:30,437
You're gonna be okay. Face the void.
484
00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:33,523
Besides, you're not gonna die yet.
485
00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:35,234
That'll be on a rolly chair.
486
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:36,235
Rolly chair?
487
00:20:37,402 --> 00:20:40,322
[shouting] Holy shit! Yeah!
488
00:20:44,284 --> 00:20:46,286
[Clancy screaming]
489
00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:50,374
[Clancy screaming]
490
00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:01,426
Hello, boy.
491
00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:03,428
Oh, that's my hose.
492
00:21:03,512 --> 00:21:04,346
[beeps]
493
00:21:05,472 --> 00:21:06,348
[squeaks, chimes]
494
00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:08,934
What are you? Are you a metaphor?
495
00:21:10,602 --> 00:21:13,438
[beeping melodically]
496
00:21:17,734 --> 00:21:18,568
Want to slide?
497
00:21:18,652 --> 00:21:19,486
[beeps]
498
00:21:19,569 --> 00:21:23,073
-Whoo! Yeah!
-[beeping melodically]
499
00:21:23,156 --> 00:21:26,243
[Clancy] Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
500
00:21:27,536 --> 00:21:28,870
[Clancy laughing]
501
00:21:29,413 --> 00:21:31,540
-Woo-hoo-hoo!
-[continues beeping melodically]
502
00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:33,917
This is the best slide I've been on.
Honestly.
503
00:21:34,001 --> 00:21:35,627
I've been on a lot of waterslides.
504
00:21:35,711 --> 00:21:36,545
[beeps]
505
00:21:36,628 --> 00:21:38,797
I need you as a bag again.
506
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:41,216
[beeps melodically]
507
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:43,552
Thanks. Bag mode, activate.
508
00:21:43,635 --> 00:21:45,387
[beeps, chimes]
509
00:21:46,346 --> 00:21:47,306
Let's go bag home.
510
00:21:48,557 --> 00:21:50,183
[slide screeching]
511
00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:52,811
[bell chiming]
512
00:21:53,270 --> 00:21:54,187
[thuds]
513
00:21:54,271 --> 00:21:55,272
[screeching continues]
514
00:21:55,981 --> 00:22:02,654
[playing woodwind instrument]
515
00:22:02,738 --> 00:22:03,989
Goodbye, Blank Ball!
516
00:22:04,072 --> 00:22:05,115
You suck!
517
00:22:06,658 --> 00:22:07,993
She said I'm gonna die on a...
518
00:22:08,076 --> 00:22:10,620
[gasping]
I'm gonna die on a rolly chair!
519
00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:14,249
[panting] Ooh hoo! Ooh hoo!
520
00:22:14,458 --> 00:22:16,084
Shit!
521
00:22:16,168 --> 00:22:17,753
[fire crackling]
522
00:22:18,754 --> 00:22:20,005
[fire whooshing]
523
00:22:22,174 --> 00:22:25,260
-[fire shudders]
-Hey, thanks, Clancy!
524
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:26,845
[in foreign accent] You are welcome.
525
00:22:28,805 --> 00:22:29,639
Mmm.
526
00:22:31,516 --> 00:22:34,102
[computer] So what are you gonna do now?
Meditate or something?
527
00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:36,271
Oh, jeez, no. That was embarrassing.
528
00:22:36,772 --> 00:22:38,899
No, I'm not enlightened anymore.
I wasn't enlightened.
529
00:22:38,982 --> 00:22:40,609
-That doesn't even mean anything.
-[sniffs]
530
00:22:40,692 --> 00:22:42,861
-[dog barks]
-Hey, Charlotte. Missed you, too.
531
00:22:44,112 --> 00:22:45,030
[suction pops]
532
00:22:45,489 --> 00:22:49,034
♪ Even though your life is out of tune ♪
533
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:52,037
-♪ You can still sing along with it ♪
-[keys tapping]
534
00:22:53,455 --> 00:22:56,917
♪ And it's better to be you
And out of tune ♪
535
00:22:57,459 --> 00:23:01,254
♪ Than acting like someone else
Who has found enlightenment ♪
536
00:23:01,338 --> 00:23:03,632
[whistling melodically]
537
00:23:03,715 --> 00:23:06,051
[Death] What does death look like to you?
538
00:23:06,134 --> 00:23:08,053
[dance music playing]
♪ One clown leg ♪
539
00:23:08,136 --> 00:23:09,971
♪ One clown leg ♪
540
00:23:10,055 --> 00:23:11,223
♪ Fourteen feet tall ♪
541
00:23:11,848 --> 00:23:12,933
♪ One clown leg ♪
542
00:23:13,016 --> 00:23:19,981
[indistinct high-pitched voice wailing]
543
00:23:23,402 --> 00:23:25,070
♪ One clown leg ♪
544
00:23:25,404 --> 00:23:26,738
♪ One clown leg ♪
545
00:23:27,239 --> 00:23:28,573
♪ Fourteen feet tall ♪
546
00:23:29,157 --> 00:23:30,242
♪ One clown leg ♪
547
00:23:30,325 --> 00:23:33,495
[indistinct high-pitched voice
winding down]
548
00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:37,040
Chirp.